Best argument debunking scientific evolution theories?

[Gawdzilla Sama]

Ya it’s kinda like how Science has proven that zillions of years ago, one day a couple of guys woke up and looked around outside and noticed some reddish stuff in the hills. We’ll call them Bill and Ralph and Ralph says: Eureka, I’m gonna make us some metal implements to make it easier to kill our dinner and ease our labor and so we won’t have to eat with our hands all the time and everything else like that. Then Bill replies: Heh Ralphy-boy, don’t forget the kiln to fire it up in. Then Ralph says: What’s a kiln? Then Bill replies: You dummy, it came to me scientifically at the same time you had your dream about water and then heard a big bang or something which miraculously made you know somehow what to do with the “red stuff” in the hills. Don’t you know anything about Science man? Then Ralph says: What’s Science? Then a 3rd guy, George, overhearing interrupts and said: relax you guys, what we’re about to do won’t be called Science until after we’re dead when someone asks how we came into existence. The others replied saying; how did we? George says, well I think there’s mainly two theories; we either came from a liquid ooze or a big explosion or maybe both somehow? Then Ralph says: what’s ooze, Bill says: what’s an explosion and George says: dunno? Then a 4th guy, Bob, overhearing says: what’s a theory? Later that night after they all took a dump by the fire and were contemplating odor; out of the dark they heard a woman yelling: Eureka, toilet paper!

[Svartalf]

You owe me 20 seconds and 15 IQ points